Ever thought about what could mess things up in your life over and over again? Feeling like you’re spinning your wheels, trying everything but nothing’s sticking? Most of us are struggling with some limiting thought or belief that limits us from reaching our true potential.
Here are 8 popular myths that have been driving your life into a rut.
1. Your past/ future is relevant
A lot of us reference our present and future, from our past. We are taught that we are a sum total of our past. But is it really relevant to your present? Does it truly define you and your life? What if you could choose and create something new everyday, instead of going back to your past and referencing your choice from that experience or situation. In reality nothing is really relevant unless you make it significant. What is relevant is living in the present and choosing what makes you feel light and joyful.
Start with keeping your past where it belongs and start making choices that feel light in the present. Rather than having the perfect plan laid out and choosing from that limitation, let’s try and choose every day and see what feels light in the present, if a choice starts feeling anything but light, revisit and choose again. Simple! That’s when you flow with life and constantly create new avenues for yourself.
What makes you feel light today may or may not feel the same everyday. That is the beauty of freedom of choice!
2. You are your given roles and identities
You may be a mother/father, sister/brother, friend, nice/nephew, uncle/aunt, wife/husband etc. Is that who you truly are? Or is there something more to you than just that title? These are just roles we play, we don’t need to lock ourselves into being that all the time. We can choose to do many things and have fun with that. If you lock yourself up in that role, you just function from being that one person. Your choices are also guided basis that title.
A mother will never be able to think and choose anything else, except from the point of view of a nurturing mother. Will that create more for her? If you are so attached to who you “are ” or the “role” you are playing, you lose part of yourself when your circumstances change. You are an infinite being that can change at any time and recreate themselves at will and choice. This sounds weird and abnormal, but have you pondered on how much you could create, if you could play all these roles and yet not be defined or locked into it.
What are you choosing for you today, that if you will, will change your entire reality?
3. Experts are always right and we MUST follow their advice
Intuitive intelligence is very important, especially if you are on a spiritual journey trying to find the right path. With intuition you must practice intellectual evaluation. Trusting something at face value without trying it and experiencing the positive effects on oneself can be very dangerous.
You always know what is right for you. How can anyone tell you anything otherwise? They can definitely guide you and share their experience/ knowledge and skills, but the true knowing always comes from within.
This is not about refusing to get your car or computer repaired when that’s required, or refusing to consult the doctor if you’re sick. It’s about always trusting your knowing and awareness rather than getting validated by anyone else. We usually shut that tiny voice inside us because we are taught to believe that everyone who is an “expert” knows better than us, which has often led us to face setbacks.
Instances in our childhood or early growing years likely caused us to doubt ourselves. Many of us might have faced ridicule for questioning an expert or asking too many questions. Many of us did know what was true for us, but had it bred, beaten or ridiculed out of us. What if you were willing to reclaim that capacity? What would your life be like if you never made anyone the “expert” of your life again?
4. You are responsible for helping everyone
How much of your life, energy and time could you free up if you were willing to give up meeting other people’s needs? Do you have to go to a vegan restaurant just because your brother turned vegan last week? Does the family always have to go out together? Are there other possibilities? Asking questions can open the door to different possibilities. Once we see that “needs” are just a creation, it becomes much easier to choose. It is important to keep in mind that you are here to be the greatness of you, not to live another’s life.
We work on autopilot and seldom say no. It’s as if we tune ourselves to society’s standards of right and wrong and operate within all the limitations instead of exploring possibilities. Every time someone asks you to do something for them, is their need really valid? Many people assume that it is your duty to do something for them, especially our loved ones. Haven’t you had someone tell you “if you love me you can do this isn’t it?” Oftentimes people use their “needs” to manipulate others. This is different from true need, which could be for e.g. a car accident and someone asking for help and even emotional needs which require genuine attention. You have to decide whether this is a true need of a person or are they holding you responsible for their emotional well being by ways of control and manipulation?
There is an old phrase which reads: “Poor planning on your part does not constitute a crisis on my part.” The interesting part is that you have to choose, whether you choose to meet the needs of everyone or you choose not to.
The choice is always yours!
5. Consistency is a virtue and symbol of maturity and stability
Ever heard someone tell you, you are indecisive? You can never stick to one job or you can never keep friends for long? Has anyone called you immature for choosing and changing your choices along the way?
And voila! With society’s pressure to be “normal” you end up being consistent in a job/ relationship just to find out you are so miserable in it.
Being consistent is like locking all your imagination in a box and not allowing any other possibility to show up for you. Life keeps changing, and presents us with new possibilities. Why would you not take advantage of that? Let’s look at an example: Suppose a child starts drawing with only three colors: red, green and blue. She paints the whole picture only with those colors and suddenly finds more colors like purple, orange, pink etc. The teacher stops her and says “how dare you be inconsistent?”. You need to use the same three colors for everything. Can you imagine how the picture would look if she used different colors instead of only three? People want to perpetuate consistency as a way of controlling the outcome. They are fearful of the unknown and unsure of what the other choices could create for them so they don’t even try.
Consistency is like death. It doesn’t allow you to explore to the fullest, it locks you into the same choices which you will probably make all your life. Being consistent will win you brownie points from everyone because that is what they do and know. If you dare to try anything different they will be be quick to judge and put you in your place because that is what they have also hears all their life.
Are you willing to break that cycle? Are you willing to shock people with your creation?
6. You are your thoughts, feelings and emotions!
“ I am not the body
I am not the thoughts
I am not the emotions
I am not the feelings
I am the Soul” – MCKS , Pranik Healing
Your thoughts, feelings and emotions are a creation of your physical mind. Your mind is an instrument through which our thoughts are formed and emotions felt. Has anyone judged you for how you think and how you feel? But does that truly define YOU? When we identify with our thoughts, feelings and emotions, we set ourselves up for being hurt, being blamed, blaming others, demanding and giving countless reasons and justifications, analyzing everything to death and generally not being present.
Thoughts, feelings and emotions drive us away from being aware and being in the present. It really has nothing to do with you or any other person, unless you want to be influenced by them. They are the lower frequencies of perceiving, knowing and being. When we function from perceiving, knowing and being, you start creating magic in your life.
7. Quid pro quo
An eye for an eye! Do you believe that you need to return a favor if someone did something nice for you? Do you feel the need to give a gift to someone if they gave you a gift? If you are always looking to even out the score with someone, you are always in reaction mode rather than creation mode. How much would that contribute to you?
If you receive a gift be grateful in receiving, rather than getting into the energy of obligation. There is no tit for tat, only acknowledgement of the greatness of each person and the moment. This is the same for receiving meanness. What if you could acknowledge a person being mean to you as: “Wow, that person is really mean”, and you don’t take it personally, say ‘interesting point of view’ and just go on with your life. Without trying to even out the score? How much ease could that create in your life?
8. Your life is an effect of external forces
It can be easy to judge others, circumstances and blame an external force for our misery. We feel that it is not our creation and everyone else is to blame for where we are. Well, the bad news is , it is not true. We create everything in our life. The good, bad and ugly. Each and every choice, question and energy that we connect to, has a consequence and the consequence whether good or bad decides whether it was a good choice for you or not.
The good news, however, is that this awareness brings us out of the victim mode and puts us in charge of our life. We are like a beach ball getting thrashed by the ocean waves, clueless, If we are still in denial that we are not the creators of our life.
Doesn’t it seem exciting to know that if you could create this horror movie, you are also capable of directing a nice romantic movie?
This also helps in quitting the blame game. Every time a person is nasty to you, instead of “they hurt me” we can think to ourselves, is this even true? Can someone truly have the power to hurt me or is it my my own emotion that is making me a feel this way. It is probably who they are and probably has nothing to do with me. It is their journey and their emotion that they have not dealt with yet. This can save you from a lot of emotional distress.
“Your perspective will either become your prison or your passport”
– Steven Furtick
Want to chat and get some perspective?
Feel free to reach out to me, you never know what that one choice can do for your life! 🙂